Healing Emotional Deprivation

Emotional Deprivation stems from the amount of nurturance, empathy and protection you received as a child.

Nurturance relates to the warmth, attention and affection of family and friends.

Empathy relates to being understood, and the validation of your feelings.

Protection relates to strength, direction and guidance.

You may have been deprived of one, two or all three of these areas. Essentially, it has made you what you are today and you feel the effects even as an adult.

This may mean being withdrawn, concealing or blocking feelings, a lack of trust, or difficulty being vulnerable with others.

It is obvious how our childhood; upbringing, and the decisions of others in a position of power influence our mindset when we are so young. It has been said that our subconscious mind is forming until around the age of six, before our conscious mind takes over.

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This then affects our relationships, coping strategies and even our level of codependency. In order, to move beyond and heal ourselves, it is our inner child that needs love. We need to mend the suffering with tenderness, processing the pain and much inner work.

Imagine yourself as a five-year-old and give yourself a hug. That’s a start.

  • Love on your young self. Speaking kind words and empower them

  • Introduce more playfulness in your life which will bring more fun and joy

  • Be light-hearted and spontaneous. Set aside your inhibitions

  • Do things your heart wants to do

  • Relive your childhood and revist things you haven’t done for a long time; roll down a hill, throw a frisbee, blow some bubbles, skip

  • Don’t hold back your feelings in relationships - let your partner know the stories playing in your head. Ask for what you need, but don’t demand

  • Accept your past and know your parents were probably doing the best job they knew how to do at the time

  • Seek help from a clinical psychologist who can help you explore this trauma

Do not repeat these same mistakes with your own children. Nurture them with your attention, have empathy and offer guidance. Be available to your children. Be someone they can look up to, ask for support or direction.

How do you feel about emotional deprivation? If you are brave enough to share, we would love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to join the conversation and leave a comment below.